1. He can follow in the footsteps of Tito Sotto, who was a lousy comedian but a very funny senator.

2. During lulls in the Senate, he can have Luningning and her dancers gyrate on the floor. But this won’t be the first time someone gyrates in the Senate. Remember the impeachment hearings of Erap Estrada?

3. He can make a privilege speech and insult anyone and everyone, since he’ll be immune from suit.

4. He can write a bill to make Pau liniment the national balm.

5. He can write a bill to make spousal abuse a non-criminal offense.

6. Hell, he can even write a bill to make women second-class citizens and mere sex toys. Chavit Singson would love him!

7. He can distribute money, not to mention dollars, to the other senators and claim he was doing it for the Senate good, complete with sentimental music in the background.

8. He can cheat his way to become Senate President. He was able to do it in his show; why not the Senate?

9. If the public loses interest in the Senate, he can offer house and lot packages to the public so they can stampede –literally speaking– to the Senate entrance. If anyone gets trampled to death, there’s always Gaby Lopez to defend him.

10. He can be the best example of why we shouldn’t vote idiots as senators.